Ear Wax Boy as he was dubbed by our buddy Suburbite, is 14 and handsome - he has such a soft heart and I think he comes across as a "tortured artist" type at school. Unfortunately, the chicks dig him.
This presents a number of problems, not the least of which is the CONSTANT onslaught of phone calls from girls every evening. Mom, if you're reading this, you know how abhorrent that is. I don't care how old-school is sounds, girls don't need to call boys. If he was interested in a girl, he would do the calling.
Problems: Son is caught up in pubescent girl drama all afternoon;
homework is suffering;
he has no time to himself and is fairly cranky;
he has a lot of years left in school and doesn't need the distraction of GIRLS to complicate things right now;
he gets very emotionally attached, like his mother, and will get his heart broken repeatedly or worse, will end up "going with" a girl who likes him a LOT more than he likes her, breaking her heart.
Potential solutions:
1. Forbid girls from calling the house and intervene by saying as much when they call - this makes it my fault, not his
2. Limit time on the phone to an hour a night before football practice
3. Make Josh wear a mask and weird clothes so the girls will change their minds
4. Just leave things as they are
What to do.....What to do....
(All of a sudden it is clear to me that NOT having been a teenaged Hottie myself was really a blessing)
6 comments:
Since it's effecting his homwork, therefore his grades which leads to not being able to play football: limit his phone time to 1 hour a night before practice.
Whatever you do or don't do, realize that "this to shall pass." Of course, he may be thirty by then, and you may be institutionalized, but ...
Oh my, does this bring back memories! Hummmmmm. You ARE the parent so you do have the upper hand and you set the limits. I remember Davey saying thanks to me for not letting girls call during the week because it got him off the hook!! ?? Boy, how do you have an hour a night to talk on the phone, plus homework, family, chores and time alone? It was always NO phone calls on school nights unless a 5 minute emergency call...like to change plans or something...but no need for any 14 year old to be onthe phone for an hour every night...better to do stuff with the family during the week if he has time on his hands. Now weekends are his after chores! Plus...girls like it when there are restrictions on calling boys all the time...(remember this: familarity breads contempt...? Think you might have heard that once or twice) lol Funny..Gary mentioned that Cody has chores feeding the horses, scout badges to work toward and homework every night and he has girls wanting to call him too, but GARY says no phone calls on week days either. Sounds good to me. Yes...this to shall pass!! Go with your gut!!! YOU be the mom and if you are wrong...you can apologize when he is 30 like anvicloud says...!!! (or...NOT) ha
Love ya...
Love ya...
I'm stepping up to say that I feel differently about all this than some of the previous commenters. I admit that my experience has been limited to girls being teenagers and dealing with phone time but here's my take, nonetheless.
Leave it alone as far as rules go for the time being. Explain that you are concerned that school/homework is suffereing and you'd like to know if he shares the same concern or has the same observation.
Ask him what he wants to do about it. he isn't 5 years old and needing you to step in and rescue him and intervene (yet).
Give him an opportunity to say how he feels about it. Ask what he thinks, what he plans to do, how you can help.
The "how you can help" part will be important. Give him time to fix it himself before you step in. If he doesn't like all the girls calling - then give him permission to use you as the reason that no more people can call or that the calling has had a limit placed.
There's a solution to this - but he needs to be the one to come up with it so he can learn life skills of self management :)
Hey, save your notes on this subject because I'll be there in 7 more years.
I like what Wash Lady said. I would try that conversation starting with "I see a problem here, do you?" You may find out he doesn't think it is a problem..LOL!
Then we drop back and punt. Chores, after school events, social obligations all take time.
We had 5 kids, one phone. You got 10 minutes a night on week nights and 20 minutes on weekends. Any other communicating was done at school.
The girls have him in school all day, that is enough unless there is one special one and for your sake I hope she is a local call!
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