Love is overtaking my life. Super.

Back in May, I was sitting with the other clinicians from the Atlanta area at an outdoor venue in San Antionio. Sweltering in the heat, we were all joking that with the extent our jobs take over our lives, that staying single was a good plan. We bemoaned the difficulties of balancing work and romance. There were 4 of us - now I am the only hold out - having received 3 wedding invitations, over the past week.

My cousin is also getting married in a month - adding a 4th invitation.

My dear friend, Spencer, is getting married, to one of the clinicians mentioned above.

I have said adamantly no thank you to my marriage-minded dates - and have purposely only spent time with people who were too busy to push for marriage.  eHarmony was probably not my best choice since several of my matches had real potential, but I wasn't in a position to move things forward.  As I grow older, there are more and more people who are willing to settle for a warm body - I absolutely refuse to be one of those people.  I will not settle ever again,  but I will also not run away if some one who is the "real-deal" happens across my path.
Love has not been good to me - at least not the romantic kind. Eh, it happens. But it occurred to me that perhaps I had dismissed connections in my life which had potential to be great relationships in favor of attachments that were unhealthy because I was "needed". This is not a good choice, by the way. I may have not been nice to Love in the first place - and have quite possibly ignored it.  The idea of getting remarried, which had never been a part of my future plans because of the situation with my son, has actually crossed my mind as a possibility down the road provided the surgery does in fact rid him of epilepsy.  I always thought I would be one of those single older women who volunteered at the church and lived next door to her son because he needed the support.  You know the ones with a big garden, a couple of dogs in the backyard and some quirky art form like windmills or organic canning. I have learned to crochet and knit already in my singlehood, so I am well on my way.  I have envisioned having my grandkids roam in the creek and make a treehouse in the pines just outside my bedroom.  This may still be the case, but there are possibilities now.

I actually told someone recently that I had a crush on him as a result of reading some of his writings-crush being defined as a temporary infatuation, not a profession of undying love and adoration (that has to be earned, despite my level of great respect for him).  I have a crush on Jeff Saturday- center for the Colts - who is way too young, way to rich and way to married to ever be interested in me.  I have a crush on Trace Adkins - who has the same set of disqualifiers.  But these are men whose work I appreciate, whose words and actions have caught my attention,  and made me respect who they are as men.   I don't forsee myself showing up on either of their doorsteps professing my love - but when they are on TV or on the radio, I listen to what they say.

For any of my male readers, you know that getting a woman to actually pay attention to what you say is at times a challenge- so in this scenario, a crush is not such a bad thing. I think that what he has to say is valuable and I want to know what those ideas are.

So while love is taking over my calendar over the next couple of months, it will be interesting to see if it actually sneaks back into my life while I am busy doing other things. I promise, here and now, that should it show up on my front porch, or my inbox, that I will be a more hospitable hostess than I have been.