A Josh Story on Jake's Birthday - (or empathy for YoJ)

Josh has always been a bit precocious. I was astounded at God's sense of humor, giving me a son to raise alone - and I was especially troubled when trying to figure out how to potty train him. We settled on throwing Cheerios into the potty and hopping he would want to hit them with the stream. He liked that game - and it worked pretty quickly, along with teh promise of Ninja Turtle underwear when he could potty like a big boy. Of course, if he had to go and was at one end of the house - he would run into my bathroom, where the Cheerios were, and use the toilet there. I was a single parent, so I never had any privacy anyway. ( And even now, I still have precious little!)

My folks had taken Josh, Bear and I out to a nice lunch at the Olive Garden, I think for either a March or a June birthday. It was one of the older ones with the tile floor which had been dropped to form a little patio in the middle. Our table was lovely with linen and a little umbrella in the middle, a little fountain - it was perfect. Josh was about 2 and right before lunch came, he said he had to potty.

I offered to have my Dad take him. He refused and said I had to take him.

I said: "Honey, I am a girl and have to use the girl's room, you are a boy and have to go to the boy's room. Grandpa is a boy and he can take you."

"Momma, you're a boy so you can take me"
"No, honey, boys have a penis, and momma doesn't have a penis, so she can't go in the boy's room"

"Oh, Momma, yes you do. It is in the cabinet next to the potty in your room."

I'll let that sink in for a second.

I was dumbstruck -actually speechless - mostly because I could only think of tampons and towels in my bathroom -and still to this day do not posess the particular item that comes to mind when a small child comments about such a thing.

My folks on the other hand, they were hysterically laughing - and it was funnier as my face turned darker and darker crimson. I am not sure what they believe little Josh saw or thought he saw in my bathroom, but should the occasion ever arise that I need to purchase such a thing, I will make sure it is hidden from Josh!