Do not waste your chances at having someone who loves you. You will never be thin enough or healthy enough or strong enough to be ready for love. It is a gift given to those who accept it when it alights in your life. There are those who miss it, and regret it later when they realize the treasure they had right in their hands.
I have done that once and have paid the price- it is invaluable to have someone who thinks you are the world- and it is exceptionally rare. Do not turn away a soul which is not in the package you anticipated. Be open to the miracle of love.
You are throwing away chances that do NOT come along every couple of days, and in so doing, mocking the love you so desperately desire. Stop playing games, ignoring calls and messages, stop bouncing between the idea that maybe you are better alone and that you are really lonely. Stop worrying about what other people say or if you can do better. Everybody needs somebody- that need doesn't make you weak, it makes you human.
I can guarantee that there will be hard times - and times when one or both people wonder what in the heck they have gotten themselves into and then think about leaving. There will be heartaches and pain and overwhelming joy and peace all in the same day sometimes. But most important, there is the deep knowledge that if the opportunity passes, we will be missing out on an amazing blessing that isn't doled out every day- and the only people to blame will be ourselves.
And now for the second part, to this person, you know who you are, I need to say these things: just be true. If you want to see me, then please let me know that. I don't want to wait to spend time with you when you are stronger. It is not your former persona that I want to be with - I didn't know that guy at all - it is who you are right now- flaws and all that has my attention. One human to another. Pick up the phone and let me hear your voice.
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