On the morning of September 20, 2004 I packed up three kids, two dogs and our suitcases and we moved here. Justin was worried about the emotional fall out, so he had arranged for us to stay at a long-term motel for a week. When I got to town, the hotel had been paid for and he was happy to have us - safe and sound. We were dazed - sleepless, tired and sore from trying to pack up our whole household in two days - and exhaustion had set in.
I remember feeling so cheated - I had given in duirng the divorce preceedings - and felt like I got ripped off. I had a good lawyer, but each time I had to call her, more money was lost - each item he argued with me about - cost more money - and in the end, I decided to save money and just let him have what he wanted. I had to give away my flock of ducks - take less than $500 in the settlement - after paying the lawyer - when I should have received several thousand and a house - and then being forced to leave a place and a family I loved - and people that I fit with.
I still don't feel like I fit exactly - I am not sure that it is a Southern thing - but more, the women I am surrounded by do things that I just don't understand - but that is a whole other issue. I have found a couple of friends here - and really, that is all a person needs.
So to date, everything has been restored that was taken from me, and more over, those things were replaced with better versions. I have my two acres back - only with a nicer house and fencing and woods. I have a husband - only this time, he actually loves me - what a concept. I have kids in good schools - and Bear even wrangled a scholarship - eliminating that whole problem of paying for college. I have fig, pecan, peach, plum, blueberry and cherry trees - replacing the cherry trees I lost. The boys have friends nearby and our house always has extra kids - and while I miss their friends in Indiana, the new friends are great. I cashed out the retirement that I put LOTS of money in while I was married to the Ogre - and that money paid for Bear's car and her housing at school, when the employment money ran out, there was a back up plan - this is so different from being with the Ogre where every expenditure was how he wanted it - and not spent on kids.
I wonder at times why God lets bad things happen to people who don't "deserve" it. I don't have an answer to that one - but I know that when He promises to make all things for teh Good of those who follow Him - He means it - my life bears that out every day. We discussed the existance of God at CCD this week - and I realize that He hasn't dropped me once, even when the day was dark two years ago today.
11 comments:
The thing I continue to remind myself of is... He never said it would be easy to follow Him, but He says He will see us through... and if I count my blessings, He is in every one.
What gets us into trouble is the gift of FREEWILL. God doesn't make us marry losers, or give us credit card debt...we do that to ourselves. I've had my share of woes, most self inflicted by MY dumb choice. But God always has a plan B...when we don't stick with plan A. So happy your plan B has worked out so well! As for Southern women...I know what you mean. I'm from the West...and I didn't understand why they did what they did either! LOL!!!!
Well, of course I have my own take which - in my belief - has nothing to do with God. But what we believe or not doesn't matter - there does come a time when we either accept being walked over or fight back. You fought back and found happiness through it. I wish I could find the balance you found, and not have a wall between myself and the world because I feel betrayed and angry. Anyway - happy 2 year anniversary! I bet you don't regret it once :)
I think when we go through tough times.. even horrific times.. it serves a purpose. It shapes who we are, how we perceive things, how we see others.
"Even from the depths, still He loves us." Welcome home, Stace.
Four dogs. While I hate the way that you were treated, I'm glad that it brought you to me. Happy anniversary, honey.
Time flies. I must have started reading you not too long afterward.
Bad things happen to good people. Good things happen to bad people. It rains on the just and the unjust.
Congratulations on your "anniversary".
I don't feel like I fit in, and I was raised in this province. I'm thinking I may never feel like "one of us". I guess it'll just be "us is one". ;-)
Blessed be you, dear lady.
You're home Stace.
Where you belong.
Good things happen to good people too. You and Justin are evidence of that.
Maybe bad things happen to good people, so they will recognise the good things when they finally come their way. I pray every night that I have it right. So very happy for all of you & feel very blessed JJ found you.
Wow, time really flies. I can't believe it was 2 years ago! Now I've had to flee my home and going through a divorce too. Hopefully, I'll be happy with things restored to me that I too am losing through this process.
Look at all you've learned and how you've grown though, Stace. God didn't give the incredible intelligence He did without a purpose for your life. Satan knows it too and that's why he tries to distract you will all the problems you encountered. You have a huge purpose in this life, maybe to help many or maybe just one. Whatever it is, I hope you realize just how incredible you are and that you are destined for greatness.
I'm proud to call you friend,
Lora
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