If you have been reading for any length of time, you know there are particular qualities that are "loner" qualities. These include diligence sometimes to a fault, compassion, giving until you are out of money, honesty, pragmatism and above all, being true to your word.
I have a part of my family who have promised to help if I only ask for it.
I asked - the help was withheld.
I asked again.
Still nothing
When they say : how are things going?
I say they are rough, there has been trouble, I am exhausted, I need help
Still no help.
I gain 25 pounds, get dark rings and pimples, worry my parents, call and ask again
Still no help.
How many times must I ask before I flip them the bird and say forget it - giving up on this part of the family?
I am thinking of boycotting any further family events until things adjust because I am tired of being called "high strung". Of COURSE I sound high strung to them - I am pissed - I keep asking them to do something they said they would - and they don't! URGHHHH!
Added note - after the final blow last Monday - I wrote a note - still sitting in my drafts. And 12 of the 25 pounds are now gone.
6 comments:
Sounds like you need to flip them the bird to me! My Mom always told me "people really don't care about your problems because they have problems of their own. They say they do, but really deep down they don't give a shit." Sad to say I think she is right...about most people. There are people that genuinely do care and those are the ones we don't flip the bird.
Let me know if I can help. I'm up to my eyeballs in trouble of my own but it's never to much to find room for my best friend!
Love ya,
Lora
I like you.
12 gone just like that? Wow, that must have been one long trip to the toilet haha ;)
Hang in there Stace. If I can help at all, just ask.
Lora - same here!
UC - you know that is all that counts!
And my friend the clown - your humor perks me up - and honestly, that helps!
Would they be offended if you said something like: "Remember you offered to HELP ME. I'm asking for your help NOW. I NEED YOUR HELP...in this WAY...right NOW. Are you going to step up and be a person of your word...or were you just bullshitting me?"
I am looking for excuses for whomever. Here's a possibility. Did you ask for specific help or general help. For eg. "Will you go get these groceries for me?" vs "Shopping tires me out." Some people need very explicit instructions.
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