SOOOOO
My mom and my retirement fund came to the rescue and allowed us to get the house issue taken care of. Funny that when my dad said I should sock away money in my retirement so that I could borrow it for a rainy day I never thought that advice would get me out of a spot this sticky. Whew!
So thanks Dad for the advice, thanks Mom for the loan and kids, when I am retired adn wandering aroudn teh house looking for my drink rather than terroroizing old men at the retirement home ( because I used my retirement fund to keep our house) you kids will just have to tolerate me and possibly ply me with good bourbon. Currently I like Red Stag Black Cherry Bourbon- safe bet to stock up now so that at least if I am wandering around searching for my drink I am happy about it.
Now part two about the house:
The truth is that most of the repairs I have done were to the best of my ability - but my ability is REALLY limited. So there are repairs and improvements that are done "half-assed" if you will pardon the phrase. Since money is tight, we are going to start with the most critical repairs and work our way out. The wear and tear of 5 people and one little 4-year-old utilizing the bathroom has left it with two leaky faucets and what feels like an ongoing funk- so the bathroom is first. Don't worry - I'll post some pictures for you!
Thursday, December 30, 2010
Thursday, December 16, 2010
The Rescuers
I remember when I started working for Medtronic, my Dad looked over my benefit information and advised me to make sure I invested in my retirement. We have a couple of options and the company takes very good care of me. As a CFO, he recognized this benefit and told me this was a great job. He was right- it is.
Over the past 18 months we have spent an unbelievable amount of money on medical bills. While America may still have insured health care, mess that it is, there are copays if you want to get things done- especially if you have to make a trip to the ER. So, I have a fairly finite salary, I have two kids who are working, but for minimal wages, and one kid not quite old enough to work who is in school. There just isn't a big revenue stream - which is something LOTS of families are facing right now.
So....little by little the mortgage has slipped behind. A few hundred dollars short one month, then a couple months later the same thing- it has gone on for quite a while. Long enough in fact for the mortgage company to notice, unfortunately. Three weeks ago I got a notice about foreclosure - and I have been sick about it ever since. How will I come up with the back money- will they even let me- will I be packing over Christmas instead of celebrating???? Super fun questions for this season, let me tell you.
I talked to God about this. I always feel a little uncomfortable asking God to help me out of a mess that to some degree, I created, but considering it meant losing or keeping the house, I didn't think I had much choice- so I asked Him to take pity on us- and on Nicole and Charlie who have already lost one home this year. He told me to pay attention- which He says quite often in response to my prayers. So.... I got all of the letters from the mortgage company and the lawyer's office and read through them. Then I filled out every last worksheet I could find from teh lawyer's office and sent it all in - followed up by several phone calls- and I got a dollar figure to work with. Honestly, once the problem is defined, it is a WHOLE lot easier to deal with!
I called a friend who does financial planning- since I can't call my Dad anymore about this stuff, and he suggested that I let the Church help me back- that is still in process. Then I called my mom, and asked her to loan me part of the money- but it is only a loan, meaning I still need to come up with cash to pay her back as I am borrowing from her retirement funds. Then it struck me: I have a retirement fund as well. Dad encouraged me to put a nice chunk of each check in that fund so that I would have "a little something put away". And amazingly enough, we are allowed to take a loan out from that money. Unbelievable. What I thought was a hopeless situation has resolved itself with 8 days to go before Christmas. Hoorah!
I am trying to use the refinancing options- trying to make a long-term fix, though I anticipate that with three months seizureless for us, our days of rampant medical bills should be over. Anyway, I just wanted to express my thanks for my Mom and my dad and my Father in Heaven for watching over me and being there when I needed their help the most. Thanks
Over the past 18 months we have spent an unbelievable amount of money on medical bills. While America may still have insured health care, mess that it is, there are copays if you want to get things done- especially if you have to make a trip to the ER. So, I have a fairly finite salary, I have two kids who are working, but for minimal wages, and one kid not quite old enough to work who is in school. There just isn't a big revenue stream - which is something LOTS of families are facing right now.
So....little by little the mortgage has slipped behind. A few hundred dollars short one month, then a couple months later the same thing- it has gone on for quite a while. Long enough in fact for the mortgage company to notice, unfortunately. Three weeks ago I got a notice about foreclosure - and I have been sick about it ever since. How will I come up with the back money- will they even let me- will I be packing over Christmas instead of celebrating???? Super fun questions for this season, let me tell you.
I talked to God about this. I always feel a little uncomfortable asking God to help me out of a mess that to some degree, I created, but considering it meant losing or keeping the house, I didn't think I had much choice- so I asked Him to take pity on us- and on Nicole and Charlie who have already lost one home this year. He told me to pay attention- which He says quite often in response to my prayers. So.... I got all of the letters from the mortgage company and the lawyer's office and read through them. Then I filled out every last worksheet I could find from teh lawyer's office and sent it all in - followed up by several phone calls- and I got a dollar figure to work with. Honestly, once the problem is defined, it is a WHOLE lot easier to deal with!
I called a friend who does financial planning- since I can't call my Dad anymore about this stuff, and he suggested that I let the Church help me back- that is still in process. Then I called my mom, and asked her to loan me part of the money- but it is only a loan, meaning I still need to come up with cash to pay her back as I am borrowing from her retirement funds. Then it struck me: I have a retirement fund as well. Dad encouraged me to put a nice chunk of each check in that fund so that I would have "a little something put away". And amazingly enough, we are allowed to take a loan out from that money. Unbelievable. What I thought was a hopeless situation has resolved itself with 8 days to go before Christmas. Hoorah!
I am trying to use the refinancing options- trying to make a long-term fix, though I anticipate that with three months seizureless for us, our days of rampant medical bills should be over. Anyway, I just wanted to express my thanks for my Mom and my dad and my Father in Heaven for watching over me and being there when I needed their help the most. Thanks
Sunday, December 12, 2010
Beauty Before Me
This morning the air was crisp, but at 45degrees, it was hardly freezing. I drove my daughter and her friend around at the crack of dawn after a very refreshing early night last night.
Nothing says rednecks like a pair of Amazon women walking into WalMart at 8am - one in pink polkadot fleece pajamas and the other in army green pants and a flannel shirt. Classy pair, my daughter and I, especially uncaffienated.
Here is something that perplexes me: why would someone say that they "have other plans" and then call to see what you are doing at 1130PM, surprised that you don't answer. I'm not doing anything except that pile of home tasks that I have put aside because I have been spending LOTS of free time with you....and I took the whole " I have other plans" completely the wrong way- assuming that you had plans with someone else that you couldn't tell me about. Yeesh- the ongoing payment for former lovers' bad behavior. Sometimes I wonder why there isn't a way to go in and undo all that faulty wiring. That would be a way to make my millions, right? Figuring out a way to undo all the damage that former lovers do to the psyche.
I really care about this man- and though we have not clearly established what kind of friends we are going to be long-term, it is clear that we are going to be friends for a very long time. All this made me wonder this morning: who do I really want to be in a partnership?
Well, I dont' want to be the victim in need of rescue- always having someone prove their trustworthiness - always looking to see what was done for me lately to appraise the worthiness of my suitor. I've seen this in action- it isn't pretty- and being on the verge of walking away all the time is just exhausting.
I don't want to be blinded by love, unable to see my love clearly, unable to tell if there is a movement from what is healthy and good into what is pathological and hurtful to us both. I would like to be blind to physical imperfections - but otherwise, I need to be able to see.
I don't want to be jaded and believe that I cannot give my heart away because it will only get broken again. I want to be someone who still believes in love- that is for darn sure.
I've been working on being who it is I really want to be as a partner for about 6 months now- trying to be honest with myself in my own shortcomings and catching myself in those self-defeating behaviors which haven't done anything to help me thus far.
I do want to be loving and kind and trustworthy and fun and most importantly: alive.
There is pumpkin and sausage soup on the stove - from a pumpkin I bought back in October who has graced my counter for over two months. The soup is warm and smells of sage and nutmeg- lovely for a day where big fluffy snowflakes drift lazily from the sky- like bluehaired ladies floating down the Lazy River, watching life pass along beside them.
The house is clean - a result of having nothing to do last night- and the need to quiet my mind. Sure sign that I have a lot on my mind: The house is clean.
There is beauty in having food on the stove, clean clothes in the closet, clean floors and bathrooms, and being caught up on my work for the weekend. There is beauty in the simplicity of a wood fire on a snowy night. There is beauty in the laughter of my boys playing in the front room and my daughter wrapping presents to go under the tree with her boyfriend.
In the peace that is my house, there is beauty in the normal comings and goings of everyday people making a life for themselves.
And in appreciating this beauty I allow myself to be happy.
Nothing says rednecks like a pair of Amazon women walking into WalMart at 8am - one in pink polkadot fleece pajamas and the other in army green pants and a flannel shirt. Classy pair, my daughter and I, especially uncaffienated.
Here is something that perplexes me: why would someone say that they "have other plans" and then call to see what you are doing at 1130PM, surprised that you don't answer. I'm not doing anything except that pile of home tasks that I have put aside because I have been spending LOTS of free time with you....and I took the whole " I have other plans" completely the wrong way- assuming that you had plans with someone else that you couldn't tell me about. Yeesh- the ongoing payment for former lovers' bad behavior. Sometimes I wonder why there isn't a way to go in and undo all that faulty wiring. That would be a way to make my millions, right? Figuring out a way to undo all the damage that former lovers do to the psyche.
I really care about this man- and though we have not clearly established what kind of friends we are going to be long-term, it is clear that we are going to be friends for a very long time. All this made me wonder this morning: who do I really want to be in a partnership?
Well, I dont' want to be the victim in need of rescue- always having someone prove their trustworthiness - always looking to see what was done for me lately to appraise the worthiness of my suitor. I've seen this in action- it isn't pretty- and being on the verge of walking away all the time is just exhausting.
I don't want to be blinded by love, unable to see my love clearly, unable to tell if there is a movement from what is healthy and good into what is pathological and hurtful to us both. I would like to be blind to physical imperfections - but otherwise, I need to be able to see.
I don't want to be jaded and believe that I cannot give my heart away because it will only get broken again. I want to be someone who still believes in love- that is for darn sure.
I've been working on being who it is I really want to be as a partner for about 6 months now- trying to be honest with myself in my own shortcomings and catching myself in those self-defeating behaviors which haven't done anything to help me thus far.
I do want to be loving and kind and trustworthy and fun and most importantly: alive.
There is pumpkin and sausage soup on the stove - from a pumpkin I bought back in October who has graced my counter for over two months. The soup is warm and smells of sage and nutmeg- lovely for a day where big fluffy snowflakes drift lazily from the sky- like bluehaired ladies floating down the Lazy River, watching life pass along beside them.
The house is clean - a result of having nothing to do last night- and the need to quiet my mind. Sure sign that I have a lot on my mind: The house is clean.
There is beauty in having food on the stove, clean clothes in the closet, clean floors and bathrooms, and being caught up on my work for the weekend. There is beauty in the simplicity of a wood fire on a snowy night. There is beauty in the laughter of my boys playing in the front room and my daughter wrapping presents to go under the tree with her boyfriend.
In the peace that is my house, there is beauty in the normal comings and goings of everyday people making a life for themselves.
And in appreciating this beauty I allow myself to be happy.
Tuesday, December 07, 2010
Pearl Harbor Day- a day of remembrance
Today is December 7th - which in our country will forever call to mind the attack at Pearl Harbor. There are stories floating around of people who were concerned about blips on the radar and rumors of Japanese ships which were way too close. Stories of these threats being reported, but no being acted upon. For some reason, the powers that be were not moved or convinced or concerned - I don't know because I just wasn't there - and stories told now by survivors are tainted with the pain of remembering decades of pain. It is hard to see where the truth is.
So many things around us are unclear-and it is so often the case that it is hard to see where the truth is. Even now, in the age of internet enlightenment and a doozen educational channels on cable, there are things that are difficult to explain like crop circles and standing stones and alien ships and Area 51 and ghosts and terrorist groups and saints and miracles and healings and the ten million conspiracy theories which swirl around. It is a lot to take in- but it catches my attention non-the-less. Where is the truth - the reality - the part of these stories that I should be paying attention to and learn from? How do you tease that out so that when the Japanese planes come buzzing overhead with the dawn, your troops are protected? Do we need to worry about being protected at all - and if so, from what?
I refuse to live in fear. We tried that once- it just wasn't the carnival ride you'd expect. I also refuse to live a life with my head in the sand.
As Catholics we profess to believe in all that is seen and unseen. Those guys at Nicea were not just throwing words together- they understoon a thousand years ago- and before - that there are things we do not see and do not understand. Okay, I have to agree with that. There are lots of things that I understand that I cannot see like atoms and the ozone layer- so I can believe that. But there are also spiritual forces that I cannot see - and just because I don't want to believe in them, doesnt' mean they aren't there. I like the idea of lumping all those menacing things together as the unseen.
But in believing in them, it is akin to believing in the threat from the blips on the radar and the rumors of war: they require that we prepare and pay attention.
We each have our little daily battles - some of us more heavily laden in our packs than others- but the war does go on.
Today, on this day of remembrance, I hope the Lord will look down with love on those families who were impacted byt Pearl Harbor - and those families who are heavily laden today - blessing them with his infusion of love.
Today, I remember and learn from the history of my people.
So many things around us are unclear-and it is so often the case that it is hard to see where the truth is. Even now, in the age of internet enlightenment and a doozen educational channels on cable, there are things that are difficult to explain like crop circles and standing stones and alien ships and Area 51 and ghosts and terrorist groups and saints and miracles and healings and the ten million conspiracy theories which swirl around. It is a lot to take in- but it catches my attention non-the-less. Where is the truth - the reality - the part of these stories that I should be paying attention to and learn from? How do you tease that out so that when the Japanese planes come buzzing overhead with the dawn, your troops are protected? Do we need to worry about being protected at all - and if so, from what?
I refuse to live in fear. We tried that once- it just wasn't the carnival ride you'd expect. I also refuse to live a life with my head in the sand.
As Catholics we profess to believe in all that is seen and unseen. Those guys at Nicea were not just throwing words together- they understoon a thousand years ago- and before - that there are things we do not see and do not understand. Okay, I have to agree with that. There are lots of things that I understand that I cannot see like atoms and the ozone layer- so I can believe that. But there are also spiritual forces that I cannot see - and just because I don't want to believe in them, doesnt' mean they aren't there. I like the idea of lumping all those menacing things together as the unseen.
But in believing in them, it is akin to believing in the threat from the blips on the radar and the rumors of war: they require that we prepare and pay attention.
We each have our little daily battles - some of us more heavily laden in our packs than others- but the war does go on.
Today, on this day of remembrance, I hope the Lord will look down with love on those families who were impacted byt Pearl Harbor - and those families who are heavily laden today - blessing them with his infusion of love.
Today, I remember and learn from the history of my people.
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