Southern Living

I come from the Midwest, and I think that probably taints a lot of what I perceive in the South. Last night I went to a Southern Living home decor party - something I would never do, except the woman who hosted is one of my favorite people on the planet - so I had to go.

The candlier is what I bought - because it was just amazingly beautiful and I thought it would be great out on our new deck - which is still theory, not reality.

It astounds me when I look at the size of people's homes. I know we had some folks in Lafayette who had some pretty snazzy houses - but this is row after row of half million dollar houses. I cannot imagine what people must be paying on their mortgages. I was completely freaked out by the higher mortgage on our place - and even with our acreage, it was no where near that half million mark. I just don't get it. What I do get, though, is that I am sadly missing out on something, I just can't place what that something is.

I was in this fantastic house - high ceilings, loft upstairs, huge kitchen - you know, an expensive house - and the other women at the table were talking about how they didn't need any more serving trays because they already had a stack of them - again, I can't even imagine. I wonder if the couple of big glass trays pushing in with my pizza stone count- 'cause I sure don't have a stack of them. Was that a requirement?

My friend, who does a lot of activism for animal rights as well as some rescue, was funny when I commented about how classy and expensive her house was. She laughed and said it was a trade off - that she'd rather have an older house to fix up if there were more land and trees. And she's right, it is a trade off.

As I pulled in the driveway last night, still talking to one of my other favorite girls, I turned off the van, rolled down the windows, saw the lights from the house reflecting on the pine trees, and heard crickets and frogs humming along in the background. My place isn't fancy. You don't pull up in the driveway and think - "wow, these folks have some cash" ( which is good, cause we don't) but it is homey - and comfortable - and like a sanctuary in the middle of town. And most importantly, it is where we have been planted.

All Things Work for Good...

Mostly, I am an optimist. I don't apologize for that exactly, but I know that it taints how I see even the worst things. It is a self-preservation measure - and since it seems to be working, I guess I'll just keep doing it. Maybe believing that this might be the day that problems resolve themselves- or that hope pays off - is what keeps a person waking up in the morning - 'cause you just never know.

My father in law offered to buy me a ticket - I decided to turn it over and let someone help me. He didn't help me - and so this morning, I had to look at plane tickets. Well, I was able to set my own schedule, and with a little fiddling, I got a flight nearly $150 cheaper than the original quotes, that flies right into Rochester, so I don't need a rental car - and I will still get plenty of time with my folks.

I don't know where to start

I went home for the weekend - and it always bring ssuch a load of emotions. NO exception this time when we drove through Lafayette - I just wanted to stay.

My folks are up at Mayo again, Dad is busy this week being poked and prodded to see if he is ready for the transplant. The doctor should let us know by Thursday if we are doing a transplant or not.

I've taken off 10 days at the end of the month so that Mom won't have to be alone while Dad is in isolation after the transplant. My inlaws offered to buy the ticket, called Justin to confirm that I was going - then didn't buy the ticket. They fucking exhaust me. My biggest pet peeve is people who offer to help - then don't . And unfortunately, that is exactly what they keep on doign.

Justin has to take up the slack when I am gone - and I know the past four days were tough on him - adn on the boys. Being a single parent is not easy even if you are accustomed to being a single parent.

Bear got to visit with one of her friends on the way home - we stopped at Panera for breakfast adn visited with Laurel and Chaz - they are so incredibly cute together.

Then we made a quick pit stop to see a friend of mine from high school. He mentioned coming by to see me about 15 years ago- when Bear was a baby. I can hardly believe that he came by and I had forgotten all about it. That was back in the trailer days - so maybe I have blocked it from my mind... anyway, it was weird.

The rest of the trip home was just interminable - seemed like every possible excuse for stop adn go traffic happened - and it took us three hours longer than it should have.

So today I am back at work - but Ireally needed another day off - and I'm sleepy - and now I am headed to get some coffee to wake my brain up!

More than corn in Indiana

well, there is more - soon to be two more girls as Bear and I head up North to see my folks and try to be of some help before they head up to Minnesota. I got a note from my dad last evening - and I thought I'd share it. Any prayers you can spare would be much appreciated:

Well, the league office (Mayo Clinic)has advised us to return to the North country to complete our schedule. We are to return to Mayo in MN this Monday (will leave on Sunday) to go thru drills (tests) prior to the Bone Marrow Transplant (BMT).

The extra chemo treatment here in Indiana was not successful in shrinking further the tumors, but the Commissioner (Mayo Doc) said we might as well and proceed with BMT. When I reminded him of what he said on our last visit, namely the tumors were too large for the BMT to be successful, he responded, "What choice do you have? Not much. This is the best option going, even though the prognosis for success is low." Coach agrees.

So we head back North. As I have subsequently learned, success means all the cancer cells have been eradicated. We'll take a partial success ("low" chance of complete success as Commissioner puts it). I have also met people who have gone through this procedure 2-3 times and have survived for 10 years. Maybe if you do it enough, you wear the disease down. So its back to Mayo for 2 months (that is, if we pass the preliminary tests). It's going to be a wintry season as it turns out. Oh well, if one has to be laid up, it might as well be snowing outside. Should be pretty holidays.

Stacey & Jerra are coming up for visit Fri & Sat before we go. Nice to see them. This season is getting a little long - been fighting this for 2 years now and prospects don't seem to be getting any better. Feeling pretty good right now (played golf yesterday- beautiful day), but the Commissioner will take care of that. That's the way these cancer docs work, you start to feel better and then they take care of that with another treatment. I noticed several obits lately where they say the person succumed after a 2 year (or 3 year, or 5 year) battle with cancer. I hate those obits because I know what they mean. But we haven't given up - still got some games left in our season. God bless each of you.

Durn it

I have been saving up to buy a digital camera, since my camera is somewhat lacking and I can never remember to pick up my pictures from MegaMart. My camera caem last Saturday, I took pictures, uploaded them - and I cannot find the silly file to put them here for you to see! ARGH!

We had a meeting with the inlaws over the weekend. There are some things we still dont' agree about, but at least the lines of communication are open. I learned a long time ago, not to go to a dry well looking for water - and that applies here.


Bear and I are taking a road trip this weekend - in preparation for my folks road trip, again, to Mayo Clinic. I posted their Care Pages site a couple months back - if you want the address, just send me a note and I'll forward the address.

In the mean time, any prayers you can send would be helpful.

Love Everybody

I am a Big and Rich fan - and I know they are officially a country band - but their music has a little bit of everything. I was astounded this weekend when I discovered that the concert we went to raised half a million dollars for a memorial for the 173rd Airborne.

The 8th of November and the Van Zants

This weekend is packed. Just chocked full beyond words. I offered to help a friend move tonight and then drop Josh off at another friend's house. Saturday we have concession stand duty, followed by a game followed by a concert. Sunday there is coffee and donut duty, followed by CCD then laundry then teen CCD - then back to work.

Oh, the concert. We are going to a fundraising concert for a monument for the soldiers of the 173rd Airborne who gave their lives and were involved in a myriad of conflicts including the 8th of November, immortalized in the Big & Rich song. The picture is of their friend, a man from the Brigade who told them the story of the 8th of November, 1965. He lives in the Dakotas now - and the song is about him. Playing are Lynard Skynard, Big & Rich, John Anderson, Cowboy Troy, and the Lost Trailers. I can hardly wait. It is a good cause, it will be a great concert.

Funny how a musical group can lure you in. I started as a Big & Rich fan when I heard Wild West show - and they won me with Holy Water over during that really dark time before I left Indiana.

Somewhere there's a stolen halo...
Someone ran away with her innocence
A memory she can't get out of her head
I can only imagine what she's feeling
When she praying, kneeling at the edge of her bed
When she prays take me away, protect me Father
Surround me now and hold, hold ,hold me
Like Holy Water

Tidbits

Things you probably didn't know:
1. I sang with John Cougar Mellencamp during dime beer night at the Bluebird in Bloomington Indiana
2. I played darts once with Henry Lee Summer (the guy who sung " I wish I had a girl who walked like that") at a pub right across the street.
3. I always wanted to sing like Whitney Houston, and used to sing at weddings for cash during college - until #1 happened and I blew out my vocal cords.
4. I always wanted to have a huge family - like 10 kids. I sometimes still get babyitis.
5. I am aspiring to be Aunt Meg - from Twister - remember her? I loved her character and I want to be her when I grow up.
6. I took the MCAT to go to medical school - and I did pretty well.
7. I've been someone's mom since I was 20. I can't remember a time when I didn't have someone I was responsible for.
8. I have a not-so-secret crush on Peyton Manning. The Sprint commercials - well, that did it.
9. I dont watch TV much -but I save Monk, Psych, and My Name is Earl as well as the Indy 500 and Colts games when we can get them.
10. I went to Tijuana with my folks when Bear was a baby and bought a pair of silver earrings for $10 - and I still have them. I had no idea until years later that it was a seedy place.

It's a beautiful day

Did you know that Claude Monet was an athiest for most of his life? He converted late in his life to Christianity, but it surprised me when I read this because the man spent nearly his entire life focused on bringing the Earth's colors and light to canvas. Odd how a person can appreciate the Creation and miss the Creator.


Yesterday was a day of small blessings. At breakfast, I talked to a friend who assured me that letting Justin handle this thing with his folks was the right course of action. I don't want to turn the other cheek, I don't want to work toward peace - but it is the right thing to do. The day just got better from there. I can get my car repaired - by someone I trust - for less than I was quoted at other repair shops. My daddy sent me a note - and a check - money he probably can't afford to send me - because he is a good dad. The chiropractor worked Jake in and popped him back into shape before practice.

Then about 10 my dad called. Even though the last round of chemo didn't do much, it did at least keep the tumors from growing, so they are goign to schedule him for a bone marrow transplant at Mayo beginning in November. That is great news. Unexpected news. And again there is a glimmer of hope where it had started to fade.


This hilljack picture is of Miley, Koda and Betty - out by the entrance to the goat pen. Betty is full grown, now. Koda ( the mostly white one) and Miley ( the mostly grey one) are only 5 months old. As a point of reference - that is a 5-gallon bucket behind Koda. Once the rest of our land is fenced off, they will be in with the goats to help guard them while we are away at work. Ol' cute puppies!

tornado